Snape's Birthday Surprise
by FiveSecondsOfCrazy
Summary: Fred and George have the perfect birthday present for Snape, but when Hermione finds out, their whole endeavor is in jeopardy. It will take a lot of fast talking on Fred's part if they ever want to go through with it.


**This was written for the January Challenge on the Twin Exchange forum. I used soup, Hermione/Fred, "Don't be thick," and Snape's birthday for my prompts. It was beta'd by pippi55. I hope you enjoy it.**

**Summary:** Fred and George have the perfect birthday present for Snape, but when Hermione finds out, their whole endeavor is in jeopardy. It will take a lot of fast talking on Fred's part if they ever want to go through with it.

They'd really outdone themselves this time, Fred thought, as he watched their potion bubble away until its consistency was similar to chicken soup. He pulled the large cauldron off the fire and waited for George to return with the food bits they needed to make it look realistic. The door opened behind him.

"Got what we need, Georgie?"

"Hardly," came a female response.

Fred whirled around and came face to face with a fifth-year prefect.

"Hermione," he said, throat going dry. "What brings you to this particular classroom on a day such as today?" He glanced at his hard work, wishing against likelihood that it would still get used.

She crossed her arms. "Does it matter?"

"A bit," he said, looking around for an escape route.

"I followed a tip."

He groaned. "I knew we shouldn't have let that first year off so easily."

Shock rippled across her face. "Fred Weasley! Are you saying you threatened a first year?" She shook her head. "Never mind. That's not the important part right now."

"What is?" he asked, pretending to be oblivious to the cauldron behind him.

Hermione walked around him and hesitantly leaned forward to get a better look at the potion. Fred noticed that she looked afraid it would come alive and devour her. "What exactly is it?" she asked, glancing back up at him.

"Snape's birthday present," he said brightly, seeing a small glimmer of hope.

She scoffed. "Don't be thick. Umbridge is on the warpath, and you want to pull a prank on Snape?"

"It's not a prank," he replied.

"What is it then?" Hermione asked, leaning against a desk. The look she gave Fred told him that he had exactly ten seconds before she left to get McGonagall.

He took a deep breath and said as quickly as he could, "Well, you see, every year we prank Snape on his birthday, but since the Toad got here, Snape's been an even bigger git than usual. George and I were going to prank him like usual, but then we figured it would be a better idea to create a calm before the storm, so to speak. We've got plans for Umbridge, and pranking Snape now means that whatever we do to her would have to be big. Well, it's already going to be big, but it won't have to be quite as huge as if we planned an ingenious prank on Snape." Fred paused to gauge Hermione's reaction and catch his breath, but he couldn't tell what she was thinking. She just stood with her arms crossed, as if waiting for him to go on.

"Instead we decided to give him a Perfect Dream Tonic," Fred continued. "It's new and not completely foolproof yet, but it does work. Our only problem is that we can't just pour it in food; it has to be mixed in thoroughly or else it won't take effect, and it tastes awful by itself. Really, we need a better way to deliver it, but I digress. We made this soup for Snape so that he can actually have a nice night's rest. And since he'll take it today, potions won't be so horrible for George and me tomorrow."

As Fred stopped, Hermione nodded her head thoughtfully. "It's nice that you're actually thinking of someone else, but I'm curious. How much do you need to eat for it to work?"

"If our calculations are correct, one bowlful," he said.

She smiled. "Have a bowl of soup, Fred."

"What?"

"You made much more than a bowlful. If it does what you say it does, you won't mind having some yourself."

"Of course not," he agreed, although he was slightly terrified. This had only been tried once, and it wasn't his turn to try what was technically still an experimental potion. Seeing no other way to pacify the prefect, Fred pulled a bowl out of his potion supplies and dipped it into the soup. He glanced up at Hermione, but she was staring expectantly at the bowl. Slowly he raised it to his lips and took a slurp. "It actually tastes like chicken soup," he realized.

"You sound surprised," Hermione said crossly.

"Well I haven't exactly tried it before," he admitted. "Lee volunteered and, hey, who are we to refuse volunteers?"

She rolled her eyes. "Of course he did."

Fred downed the rest of the bowl and held it out for Hermione's inspection. He grinned as her eyes scanned the empty bowl and his face. "Fine," she said after a moment, "you can give it to Snape."

"What?" George asked as he came into the room.

Hermione glanced at him and merely shrugged as she walked towards the door. She paused at the doorway on her way out to look back. "By the way, if you need help with that prank on Umbridge, I'd be glad to take part. I have plenty of ideas I'd love to try out on her, but I'd be fine to just act as a scout or something."

"Bloody hell," George said quietly as she slipped away. "Did Hermione Granger actually just offer us help on a prank" He turned to stare at his brother. "What did you say to her, Freddie?"

Fred didn't reply. He was too busy wondering whether this new, prankster Hermione would make an appearance in his Perfect Dream that night.


End file.
